Monthly Archives: August 2014

How Long Will I Love You?

How long will I love you?

As long as stars are above you

And longer, if I can

 

How long will I need you?

As long as the seasons needs to

Follow their plan

 

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What’s Your Next Move?

Some people are good planners. They make careful calculations on how to proceed on a certain task and then they execute with precise precision. I’d like to say I’m one of those good planners, but I’m really not.

I used to try to do the whole “go with the flow” type of approach in life but that didn’t really get me anywhere. One of my worst fears in life is closing your eyes for a bit in the present, and then waking up all of a sudden in the middle of the night when you’re 60 years old. It’s like blinking from one moment onto the next.

This fear has led me to, or has dutifully forced me to think of the future with more caution. But how in the world do I do that? Do I dream big like I’m part of a Disney movie or something? Do I go Frank Underwood ala House of Cards and manipulate, extort, and connive my way onto the top? What should I do?

It’s cheesy to say to trust in the man above. It’s too… oh how do I put it… preachy. I mean, all of the things I’ve done or have accomplished have been orchestrated by some supernatural force that can’t be explained. It’s weird to explain, really. Nearly all of the work I’ve been getting are landing on my lap. It’s weird and it’s strange.

So what do I do? Do I wait for another something to land on my lap or do I take my matters into my own hands and plan my life ahead like a model son?

In the end I just want to do good – good in a sense I just want to do what I feel is right. As much this is about my life and my goals, there are people around me. It’s not that I overly go out of my way to help people but more of the fact that I realize there are people around me who support me and in turn I can support myself. Or even if I feel that I don’t have any support, and even the people closest to me who don’t believe in me, I must march on and do what I think is best.

Change is coming. I can feel it. I can sense it. All I want to do is to change myself first before the environment around me changes first.

 

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Are You Ready To Die?

death

Pretty straightforward question I know. But really, are you? Do you want to go out while you’re at the top? Are you willing to wither and die when you’re 90 years old?

Are you one of those people who want to leave a legacy? The ones who work and toil just to make a name for yourself? Do you even care what you do or what you don’t leave behind?

Death has always been a touchy subject that not a lot of people want to discuss. Of course. People don’t want you to die right? Questions about when I want to leave the afterlife struck me because of my grandmother.

She’s been staying at our home for a couple of days now, going in and out of the hospital for checkups, therapies, and whatnots. Am I afraid of her dying? Of course. But I’m also deeply saddened on how weak and fragile she looks. Have I accepted the possibility of her —? Dying? Yes, I had to. I think I’ve welcomed the idea of death a lot of times during my life. Not really suicide per say, but more of accepting as part of life. People get old, get sick, or get into accidents, and just BAM they’re gone. Even the slow deaths still leave people in shock.

The other thing that scares me the most is what happens after our loved ones die. People always say “they’ve gone to a better place.” But what if they don’t? What if they were really awful people and we were all just naïve to accept it? What if he lived a double life that nobody else knew?  Heaven and Hell are taboo subjects as much as death is but what if a multitude of people already went to Hell? I mean, that’s a possibility right?

Okay, let’s move out the concept of Heaven or Hell. Let’s focus on what we can see. Let’s say you die right now with no idea of where your soul is going, is that fine with you? And what about the family you’re going to leave behind? Are there some things left unsaid? Old friends and colleagues?

I honestly believe that no one is ready to die. It’s one thing to accept death but I think it’s another thing to be “ready” for it. Preparing to die is a sad way to live. You live because of life, and not because of death. No one may be ready to face death, but that doesn’t mean we have to cower in fear. Easier said done, but it’s better to live life unafraid.

 

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What’s The Worst Breakup You’ve Ever Heard? (Part 3)

Breakups are never good, and I mean never ever never ever. Repeat 1 zijimillion times. In this third and final installment of “What’s the worst breakup you’ve ever heard?” I’m about to share in what I believe the worst story I’ve heard and oddly enough, a realization that there are worse stories out there waiting to be heard.

Again, I’m no expert in love, dating, or marriage. In fact, I honestly think I absolutely suck at this whole love business. I’m like a freakin’ turtle trying to learn how to fly. Like an African kid attempting to play ice hockey. Like a student desperately solving Grade 11 Mathematics…. Oh wait, that last one is exactly me. It’s that bad. Thus, I am no stranger to heartbreak, heartache, and whatever negative word you can attach to the word Heart. I’d like to say that I’m the only victim here, but of course not, and of course in most cases I am the one who causes the pain to people. That’s me, breaking hearts since ’88! (Cue 80’s power ballad love song here).

I know it’s been a month since parts 2 and 3. I was busy, to say the least and if you read my previous post, I was looking for words to write.

Through these entries, I’ve realized that there are people who have gone through some real shit in their relationships. Nobody should compare situations however. Your journey is your own and you shouldn’t feel too happy or too sad about your own situation when you compare it with other people. There’s always a reason why someone is going through something. Even though I do realize that there are really worse stories out there, I just want to say, I feel you and hope you’re getting better.

Anyway, here is the third and final part of “What’s the worst breakup you’ve ever heard?”

3) It was not meant to last

BACKGROUND:

Krissy and Mike were together for 4 years. Normal couple I should say. They had their share of happy moments and fond memories, and just like every other couple, they’ve had their downs, trials, and fights. But through it all, they stayed true to each other.

They got engaged and everything was pretty set at that point. It all seems like a fairytale right?

THE HOW AND THE TIMING:

Engaged and ready for marriage, it all seemed too good to be true. Call me skeptic, but somehow things aren’t always what they seem. And true enough, Mike called off the wedding because of vague reasons. They were so vague that Krissy didn’t even believe him at all. They were shallow reasons covered by fear, doubt, and cowardice.

To make matters worse, the man called it off on Valentine’s Day. It was a punch to the gut, a knife to the heart, and a goddamn waste.

THE AFTERMATH:

Courageously, Krissy got back up on her feet after months of going through sheer pain and shame. You could imagine. After months of going through the typical shit after a breakup, she decided she wanted to be better. Her aftermath story is something of a magazine story – “Girl overcomes breakup through working out.” And that’s exactly what happened. She gathered her bearings and went out and became one badass sexy chic by working out and living healthy. Trust me on this one. I saw photos of her before the breakup and she was no way near to who she is today. Today she’s a bonafide beach girl. She lived in the gym and became a total babe. All that rage, pain, and all that emotion was devoted into making a better version of herself.

***

As I was writing this particular entry, I may have heard another story that would top #3. Seriously. I was part of a training session for a client I was working for and one of the trainers, let’s just name her Marian, shared one story that made realize that I am too young and too inexperience to have my own list of the worst breakups. The story made me feel… well, to put it frankly, it made me feel that I knew nothing.

I won’t go into the details but Marian saw his man cheating after 11 years of being together. 11 freaking years. And they broke up on New Year’s Eve. What an asshole!  I’ll leave it at that I guess.

So if you’re reading this and who have gone through some sort of shitty breakup, take heart and give yourself a break. Your ex may or not be an asshole so let’s not compare stories. The point is not to feel better or worse of yourself when you hear or read about other people’s breakups, but it is about realizing that love is precious to other people. It’s special. Well, it’s supposed to be special and no one has the right to feel unwanted and unloved.

 

 

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How In The World Do I Write?

As a struggling writer, one could say that words left me for quite some time. Don’t get me wrong, I have been writing consistently for work. But somehow, I wasn’t sure if I was writing for myself or for my audience. As I develop my voice as a sportswriter or as a journalist, I felt the need to go back to this: to where it all started. Writing for my own is one of the happiest and most fulfilling things I look forward to. And depending on how you look at it, this fact is either depressing or inspiring. HAHA.

I’d like to say I’ve improved over the last couple of months. My editors have given me constructive criticism and sometimes downright “WRITE LIKE THIS” pointers but inevitably it was all about finding my own voice in writing.

For the last couple of months, I’ve broken down my method in writing. I am writing this so I can share this with you but more importantly so I can remember them. I don’t about you but as a writer I always feel the need to categorize everything and put things into perspective.

Without further ado, here is what has been hovering around my brain the past couple of months whenever I write:

1. Inform

First thing’s first.  What the hell are you writing about? Provide your audience all the information necessary whether it be stats, data, facts, and whatnot. The readers want to know something and that’s why they clicked the link, or read your article somewhere, or heck, even maybe bought your book. Humor with them with the right information.

2. Insight

Given the info that you’ve generously provided, what now? Why would the reader even care? Or in other cases, the information that you’ve given may have already been read. Maybe it’s all over the news (or worse, social media) and you find yourself just repeating what everyone else is saying. When people go read your stuff, they want to know what you think and not anyone else’s. Or better yet, YOU give them something to think about. Stir debate, make controversy, or whatever just as long as you make them think.

3. Creativity

This is when you get to express yourself as a writer or in a broader sense, as an artist. Use metaphors, symbolisms, pop culture, movie references, and most of all, poetry. Writing in any form or of any kind should be made beautiful.

Oh, and another thing, this may seem odd but try to avoid adjectives. WHAT? I know. But what I mean is that rather than just saying that a girl is beautiful and loveable, say that her beauty makes me scream I love her at the top of my lungs but with her it only comes out as a whisper so that she alone can hear it. Or you know, something like that. In other words, make your adjectives come out of the pages and let it cut to the readers’ heart.

4. Simplicity

Less is more. Always. To be honest, this is one of the things I struggle with as a writer. I tend to overly blab about one thing and sometimes it’s cute or personal but it can also get irritating. Thank goodness for editors right?

Anyway, show emotion but don’t overreact. Show heart but also show sincerity. Be cool and calm dude.

5. Delivery

Writing can be like doing a standup comedy at times. You have to setup the punch line in order to create the impact you want on your readers. It’s all about delivering your message with accuracy and precision.

That’s it for now.

Remember – Inform, insight, creativity, simplicity, and delivery.

Off to more writing!

 

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